He Takes Me Back- Testimony

The above picture depicts who I was far away from Christ.


Nahum 1: (An oracle concerning Nineveh. the book of the vision of Nahum of Elkosh.)
God's wrath Against Nineveh

The Love is a jealous and avenging God; the Lord is avenging and wrathful; the lord takes vengeance on his adversaries and keeps wrath for his enemies. The Lord is slow to anger and great in power, and the Lord will be no means clear the guilty. His way is in whirlwind and storm, and the clouds are the dust of his feet. He rebukes the sea and makes it dry; he dries up all the rivers; Bashan and Carmel wither; and bloom of Lebanon withers. The mountains quake before him; the hills melt; the earth heaves before him, the world and all who dwell in it. Who can stand before his indignation? Who can endure the heat of his anger? His wrath is poured out like fire, and the rocks are broken into pieces by him. The Lord is good, a stronghold in the day of trouble; he knows those who take refuge in him. But with an overflowing flood he will make a complete end of the adversaries, and will pursue his enemies into darkness. What do you plot against the Lord? He will make a complete end; trouble will not rise up a second time. For they are like entangled thorns, like drunkards as the drink; they are consumed like stubble fully dried. From you came one who plotted evil against the Lord, a worthless counselor. Thus says the Lord Though they are at full strength and many, they will be cut down and pass away. Though I have afflicted you, I will afflict you no more. And now I will break his yoke from off you and will burst your bonds apart. The Lord has given commandment about you: No more shall your name be perpetuated; from the house of your gods i will cut off the carved image and the metal image. i will make your grave, for you are vile.

Jonah 3:4-5: Jonah began to go into the city, going a day's journey. And he Called out, "Yet forty days, and Nineveh shall be overthrown!" And the people of Nineveh believed God. They called for a fast and put on sackcloth, from the greatest of them to the least of them.

Jonah 3:10, When God saw what they did, How they turned from their evil way, God relented of the disaster that he had said he would do to them, and he did not do it.

In this story, It only took one man, Jonah, To obey Christ and reach out to Nineveh. Of course he ran from God in the beginning, but did eventually make the journey to Nineveh saying to them, " Yet forty days, and Nineveh shall be overthrown!" These 8 words had such an impact on this city, that the whole population of Nineveh turned and repented. Because of this, God had mercy on them showing compassion.

I guess it all started when I turned 16, I was offered my first job being a cashier at Krogers. Entering the work force I was introduced to this other world, so full of excitement and new things I had never done before. I started getting all this attention from boys and other girls and I was overwhelmed. People actually thought I was attractive and fun... They wanted to be my friend!!! (Keep in mind that I had been home schooled for my high school years and only knew people from church. And I was not really popular there) For the first time in a LONG time I felt accepted and wanted, but the pier pressure was something new. It wasn't long until I had my first, then second boyfriend. The first didn't last that long, but the second is a different story. Said boyfriend was my first "love", he introduced me to this whole new way of living. I started to become really distant from my parents. I became really disrespectful and started to rebel majorly. Lying became my language and manipulation my strong point.

I started hiding things from my parents and hurting them with words and my actions. It wasn't long until I gave into Wordily things. My life was spiraling in a downward motion and my parents started noticing. At the time, I thought I was having the BEST time of my life. I couldn't understand why my parents were all up in my business and tightening the "leash". But I didn't like it one bit. I became more adamant in everything I did, Which got me kicked out at the ripe age of 17. I went on the live with said boyfriend and his parents for the next year of my life. Said boyfriend and I had a small group of consistent friends that we hung out with almost daily. On the weekends we would all gather at my boyfriend's uncles apartment for hang time. His uncle was a 30+ year old single man, I'm sure you can see the trouble or danger there, but I didn't then. He let us do anything we wanted, and there wasn't any discipline or constructive criticism.It wasn't long until everyday seemed like a big party and I saw nothing wrong with that.

after awhile I ended things with the boyfriend and I had moved back in with my parents. I was still infected by the world that I again, could no longer stay with my parents. About this time I had met my husband.

I started my first job working as a bartender/waitress at a bar downtown. Nothing good ever came from working at a night bar, surrounded by men and edgy dressed woman. I remember going to the rodeo one year with some people I worked with. I started the day off very wrong and then headed down to meet everyone that was going. I made a bunch of bad decisions and then hopped in my car to drive home. The last thing I remembered before seeing the bright flashing red and blue lights behind me trying to get onto the freeway going the WRONG WAY!!!! Thankfully no other car was coming my way and I'm not sure how I noticed I was heading the wrong way on the free way, but I somehow managed to turn around and got on the track going home. I remember exiting multiple times thinking it was my exit, but it never was. When the cop's finally pulled me over, They let me know that I had been driving on all four lanes of the highway and the exit I had taken was taking me to a very dangerous neighborhood. I'm very thankful the cop's pulled me over, it definitely saved my life and that of others. I went to jail that night.

I sat in jail for 48 hours before getting bailed out, and Not a single minute did I enjoy it. But even that did stop my drive to have a good time.

I continued living life going down the wrong path and not one turn I made was a good one. My life was definitely a huge mess but I didn't look at it that way. About a month after Ike I found out I was about 8 weeks pregnant. Completely terrified and unsure what I was going to do, I made an appointment with the doctor to find out if I was in fact pregnant. As soon as I saw this little peanut with a pumping motion right in the middle did my heart finally change.

My Daughter was my saving grace, and I think God for her every chance I get. I remember my sister calling me one day and telling me that my story had been one of the biggest turn around stories she had ever witnessed. She said it was almost like God gave me a child because he though that would be a harder trial than a couple years in Jail.. And I think she was right. I'm not perfect, and I will continue to make mistakes but I will never turn my head from God and walk the wrong way down the street again.

This is my testimony and its not much different from the story of Nineveh. There isn't a single person that God wont take back. There isn't a single thing you can possibly do wrong that can't be forgiven by Jesus Christ. You have to realize your on the wrong path and have a heart change asking Christ to come into your life and save you. Through Man this is impossible, but through Christ anything is possible.

Precious Father I life up our sins to you and ask for grace and compassion. I think you for forgiving my evil ways and continuing to forgive my failures. I know that I'll always fall short of the person I'm supposed to be Lord, But I praise your name for being a compassionate God. One that is slow to anger and understanding. I pray for those who are struggling right now Lord, I life them up to you... please forgive them, for they know not what they do. Continue to pour our your blessings on this blog and your flocks of nations. I pray that more people will step up to your name and Shepard your flock. We lift you up father and praise you daily. We love you and in your holy name, Amen.


Journey Together, Love Jesus, Bring hope to the world

God Bless you.

Not my name Jesus

Ecclesiastes 1:4-11 A generation goes, and a generation comes, but the earth remains forever. The sun rises, and the sun goes down, and hastens to the place where it rises. The wind blows to the south and goes around to the north; around and around goes the wind, and on its circuits the wind returns. All streams run to the sea, but the sea is not full; to the place where the streams flow, there the flow again. All things are full of weariness; a man cannot utter it; the eye is not satisfied with seeing, nor the ear filled with hearing. What has been is what will be, and what has been done is what will be done, and there is nothing new under the sun. Is there a thing of which it is said, "See, this is new"? It has been already in the ages before us. There is no remembrance of former things, nor will there be any remembrance of later things yet to be among those who come after.

ESV explains; The "Vanity" of the Natural World. The endless repetition of natural seasons and cycles never produces anything "new" and thus appears to be without direction or purpose. There is no remembrance of former things, nor... of later things. Or, if the reading in the footnote is accepted, "there is no remembrance of former people...nor...of later people" As the generations come and go there are very few people who make any significant impact on the course of world history; the majority of the human generations thus appears to be as purposeless as the repetitive cycles of the natural world.

I think its only natural, being human, to want our name's to be known around the world or even in our small circle of friends. The want to feel popular doesn't ever leave us, does it? We are faced with clicks where ever we go, what ever age we are or stage of life we're in. I used to think it would be different in a place like church, but unfortunately I have been let down in that thinking. For someone on the outside looking in, its already intimidating enough walking into a place like church let alone looking around and seeing the same ole thing that one would see everywhere else. You might ask,"Where do I go now, Where do I fit in, Am I accepted?" The truth is, nowhere you go, will you ever find perfect worldly. Christians aren't perfect and EVERYONE makes mistakes and falls back into every category "society" deems acceptable. We are attracted to other people like us, So how can this change? Well it only takes one willing person to make a difference. My thought is, that person will have to completely get rid of themselves, pick up their cross and walk whole heartily shedding their skin and putting on Christ's. Then and only then can a difference be made.

I have a driving passion to not let my name be known but rather, in the end, I hope when people think of me They'll only, be able to see God. Nothing I do right or wrong is because of how smart I may be, Wise or outgoing. Everything done through me is because God gives me that strength and the ability to reach out. I have to catch myself daily because naturally I accept the glory, but the glory is not mine but is to be God's alone. For example, I have to be careful to not take the responsibility for whether or not Kayla goes to live on her life as a shining example for Christ, if she makes many mistakes, becomes a doctor or the begging city bum you pass walking to work everyday. I have to make the choice to live the way God calls me to live and be the best example I can possibly be of His love and grace. In return giving him the glory and praise for every outcome.

A month or two ago I partook in one of the most life altering bible studies I've had the privilege to be apart of. Priscilla Shirer's "Jonah" (Navigating a Life Interrupted) completely turned my life upside down forcing me to look in the mirror at my life in its current state allowing me to see me for who I really was. This study should come with a warning... May open Pandora's box..... Because that is exactly what it has done in my life. But there is no one I wouldn't recommend this study to. If you want a life altered and the ability to drop your name, I challenge you to take on Jonah. You will not be disappointed I promise you this.

This is my constant Surrender- I declare to put a stop to my obsessive ways,my hard heart, my fear of trust, change and the desire to steer my life "making" things happen. I promise to surrender these things to God and run after his plan whole heartily. For i Want to make a lasting impression on History, That my NAME not be remembered but HIS.


Oh God, My God I scream out from the depths of my heart for your name to be known across the nations. That your people would drop theirs names and put on yours. You are to be praised at all hours of the day, You are such a loving and gracious God slow to anger but abounding in steadfast love. Oh, Lord we do not deserve a love like yours. Thank you for being the God you are to a sinner like me. I am nothing but Judas's Kiss and you love me anyway. Praise be to your name, May you reign in my heart forever. I pray over my readers and the flock of nations, that they may be introduced to a God like you, I pray for their salvation Lord and I pray for this blog, Please speak through me and guide my thoughts so that I through you may reach many. We love you father, we need you Father... Please forgive our transgressions Lord, Help us never to forget the price you paid for our salvation. In your holy name, I pray... Amen

Journey Together, Love Jesus, Bring Hope

God Bless you

Realization- Time to let go

After yesterdays post I was able to think and process, the best I could, many of the things mentioned. It wasn't until a very wise man emailed me, that I finally understood it all. In following are some of the things said that will forever have a lasting impact on my life. My hope is that it may reach someone else and have the same lasting effect.

"Sometimes I think its hard for anyone who finally realize they’ve made mistakes that can destroy their future to realize everyone – I mean everyone – makes mistakes. And really, a mistake is a mistake. Except for God’s grace, all mistakes make us failures in God’s site. But Jesus’ blood hides those mistakes from God’s eyes so all he sees is a perfect child.

You need to remember Jesus’ blood hides those mistakes from others and should also hide them from you. The past is the past and it should stay in the past. If you are afraid the past has the power to again become the present, then it means the thing you fear is not in your past and you need to put it there. Forgive yourself, forgive the men, trust God as you are and the past will totally loose its power over your future."

Amen right? I'm only human to linger on these "mistakes", but doing so turns out to be so destructive to my life. I realize now that I have been stuck in this tragic wheel of thinking and I couldn't even tell you where it ends because I have not yet found that point myself. Astoundingly though, This email screams truth and wisdom to my ears.

The past is in fact the past and most remain in the past! What you are left with is a testimony, that if used properly and understood, turns out to be an amazing tool.

I stand today completely freed from the shackles that bound me and choose to praise God for his blood that covers my sins.

This very wise man who sent the email happens to also be my Dad. His name is Richard Quinn and together with my mom Karen Quinn they have a total of 22 kids. After being blessed with 3 beautiful children, on the outside one might say, " This family seems complete." But little did they or anybody else know just what God was brewing in their hearts.

As I understand it from my mom, My name, my plea for help and someone to love me made its appearance in the form of a church brochure. On that Sunday morning my dad's eyes caught image of the little description under the little picture of one curly-blond haired and browned eyed young girl. He nudges my mom's side showing her the brochure while sporting an endearing look. You could imagine, my mom now having 7 kids (4 adopted) wanted to take some time to pray about this. Thankfully after a couple weeks and my face continuing to appear on that brochure, God finally came through to my parents.

Hello, My name is Tiffany (Quinn) Moran. I have a forever family and the best thing about that is, I also have 22 siblings. Most importantly, I was given the GREATEST gift anyone could give another. I have and know the love of Jesus Chris, It has been imprinted forever in my mind and heart and I owe it all to my parents.

Maybe, Just maybe, This whole "Getting rid of me" thing isn't going to be such a challenge after all. I mean, look at how far I've already gotten. Matthew 19:26 - But Jesus looked at them and said. " With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible." Friends, ALL things are possible if you just allow God to take control.

Today I was led to Ecclesiastes 1:1-3 and the funniest part about it all is last night Chris and I were joking about something, I can't remember really what about, and he jokingly spat out Ecclesiastes 1:13 in reference that it has some meaning to what we were talking about. So, I told him that I would indeed look up that verse, but little did I know that there would be huge importance in that verse. That had nothing to do with what we were joking about if I may add.

Ecclesiastes 1:1-3... Vanity of vanities, says the Preacher. vanity of vanities! All is vanity. What does man gain by all the toil at which he toils under the sun?

Confused yet? I didn't really understand this verse much until I read a little more description about it. What does Vanity refer to in this verse? I'm not sure since the Preacher leaves it unexplained. However, as the book progresses its meaning becomes more clear. What does man gain? The ESV explains it- This repeated question is born out of the Preacher's realization that "all is vanity" if life frequently makes no sense and pleasures and achievements are "fleeting," is there any significance to human existence? The phrase under the sun does not indicate a "secular" point of view, as is often claimed but rather refers to the world and to mankind in their current fallen state.

Ahhhh Haa! Well then, that makes a lot of sense :-). In my case, Vanity is my past and today's trials. I don't gain anything at all by toiling in my current state about it. I can't change my past or make better things happen, so why do I try? Because I must be insane :-). Maybe that's a little to far, but maybe its because I want to be the conductor of my life. Because for some reason I have felt like I could make better outcomes of situations. The truth is, I am nothing but a catastrophe waiting to happen and I don't want any part of that. Friends, Please do not let your life get to this point. Trust in God, trust that he has a better plan for your life than the one you have sitting on that pedestal. Because chasing after that "life" has brought me nothing but heartache.

Ecclesiastes 1:13... And I applied my heart to seek and to search out by wisdom all that is done under heaven. It is an unhappy business that God had given to the children of man to be busy with.

I don't know about you, but I want to be wise and have wisdom. According to this verse it is an unhappy business to be in. It wasn't until today did I completely understand wisdom. You see, I have wisdom already but it is up to me how I use it. Everything I have been through thus far and everything that I've witnessed under heaven play a role to my wisdom. The reason why this is important is because I used to look back at my past and see nothing but failure in a big pile of useless garbage..... One mans garbage, is another mans treasure. God's going to use my past in miraculous was and I'm going to hold on to the wisdom received from it.

Its amazing to me what I could miss if my ears aren't open. You see, Chris spatting out this verse last night could have gone in one ear and out the other. I decided to look it up, and its a good thing I did :-)

Today, My Faith and Trust is in the Lord. I pray for the Holy Spirit to be my earthly light unto the path my Heavenly Father had laid down for me. I continue to pray that I learn to fully respect my Husband and become the woman/wife and mother I am appointed to be.

Our Mission Statement: Journey Together, Love Jesus, Bring Hope ( together with the community of Woodsedge Community Church)

God Bless you

Confused and Lost

I have never been that great with writing or had a driving passion for blogging. So why am I starting this blog? Well for two reasons really, for one I have ADD and I feel like being able to keep up with this blog might be a BIG help for me being able to keep up and organized with life. Most importantly, I feel like God is calling me to start this blog so that people know that they are not alone and our struggles really aren't that different. I've started two blogs prior to this one and they've always tragically ended after a couple days. I have faith that the same outcome will not happen it this blogs case.

Who am I? I feel like I'm constantly asking that question. I'm not exactly sure If I know who I am, or what my purpose is. Why was I placed on this earth? Is there really something huge that I'm supposed to accomplish in this life? I guess my problem here is that I want to have all the answers, but what if I did? Would I be any happier? Would I then feel like life is complete?

I've struggled my whole life with change. I was born into a incompatible situation to drug and sex addicted parents. I was the third child to be born to my parents and we're all about two years apart. Unfortunately for my brother and sister, they had four and two years of abuse and neglect on me. They were in bad shape and sadly for me, that would be my story for the next 3 years of my life. According the the 'documents" I was never at one place for to long, always being passed around from one relative to another and never being together for longer than a week, at times, with my brother and sister. It was Man who damaged me the most. On one account, my mother who was separated from my father and living with her also drug addicted boyfriend had me in their possession. This man wanted nothing to do with my siblings let alone me. His every desire or want included him being completely messed up on drugs, having my mom in the same state and to have sex whenever he wanted it. So of course there could be no distractions or room for whining kids in his plan. He hated when I cried in fact he hated it so much that whenever I would cry he'd walk over grab my ankles and swing me around several times hitting me against the wall until my cry's could no longer be heard. Where was my mom? isn't a mother supposed to protect her children? Well not my mom, she was always to high or drunk to have a conscience let alone stand up for me. I've struggled my whole life with men, from being completely scared of them to feeling like a huge constant disappointment never being able to be what they want or desire. How is that fair? Why me? Why my mom? Where was God?... I try not to think about this, but the truth is it's apart of me of who I am, and I can never escape it. I can't tell you how many times these questions flowed through my mind like a wild spring flows through the Vally. I have been so angry with God for so long, So angry with my life my situation that I can't remember when it started to become numb to me. Why me God? Why did it have to be me, why do I constantly day dream about this perfect life involving parents who look like me, brothers and sisters who are my blood? I didn't sign up for this life and I didn't have a choice in any of it......

Taking this account and fast forwarding to today I am 24 years of age and Married. Together, my husband and I have a 2 year old daughter. Guess what? I still feel like a big disappointment to man especially my husband. But whats worse is, I can't escape the biological thread that links me to the mother who stood by watching while her infant daughter was beaten to silence all because of her cry's for her mom, for attention and for food. The biological personality and abuse accrued completely terrifies me of the mother I may be towards my own daughter. through the years leading up to today, and little by little my story will unfold, I have put away, banned, completely outlawed my hurt, disappointment and depression and numbed myself completely to its hurt. For years I fronted emotions and acted like the person I thought I felt the world wanted to see. Because of this and of recent events, I have found me to be an extremely depressed and emotional person in need of serious counseling and an undying love and acceptance from something or someone bigger than me. I have been for years leaning on other people especially my husband and doctors for answers and feel good solutions. Even though the "solutions" have helped out and changed the outcome of situations in one way or another, they have always only been temporary fixes. However, the one thing I have found to be completely constant is being able to find that refuge in Christ Jesus, my Lord.

Not only do I not handle change well or feel accepted and praised by man, I have the hardest time trusting in anything or anyone but myself. You could imagine then, having to put my faith and trust in a man that I can not see or touch and walking blindly in the direction of His calling is extremely hard and almost undoubtedly impossible for someone like me. Well to be completely honest, It isn't easy for me. It has to be a daily surrender on my behalf otherwise it will never be done.

I'm confused because I feel like I am trying but getting no where. I'm sick of feeling exhausted, beaten, let down, being a constant disappointment and being completely lost. Surprisingly I will continue to press on putting my faith and trust in a man that promises me salvation and peace in his arms. Ahhhh, peace in His arms, those few words put in that sentence have a greater meaning to me behind it all. He promises that through him, I will struggle with this no longer.

It never fails to amaze me just what God will show me if my heart is willing to hear from Him. During my quiet time today Christ met with me and led me to proverbs 31: 10-31. In Proverbs 31:10-31 it talks about The Woman Who Fears the Lord. It talks about all of the qualities a Godly woman/wife/mother should posses. At this point, I don't believe I honestly portray any of these characteristics but want so desperately to achieve such a personality. "In the ESV translation it defines the mention of a woman who fears the Lord at the end of the long list of excellent qualities to bring back the theme of the book of Proverbs stated in 1:7. It reminds readers that this woman excels in her fear of the Lord, and therefore that she is a model of the character traits and wisdom taught throughout the book's 31 chapters. The appearance of this woman's fear of the Lord at the end of this list is also a reminder that this quality is more important that even great skill and talent, and is foundational to the wise and right use of all activities and skills. A godly woman may well have outward charm and beauty, but these are of secondary importance to her godliness."

This will undoubtedly prove to be a hard process of getting rid of me and being transformed in Christ. Being honest with myself and my past allowing forgiveness and healing to take place will have to be the first step. You can't know where your going, If you don't know where you've been.

Today, my faith and trust is in the Lord. My prayer is that of forgiveness and healing for the situation I mentioned earlier so that I may be able to move forward with more trust and the ability to accept change. I pray that I learn to respect my Husband as he should be and become the woman, wife and mother God has appointed me to be.

Our Mission statement: Journey together, Love Jesus, Bring Hope.

God Bless you